Friday, April 30, 2010

Suurrrpriiiiiiissssse!

I would love to be surprised with winning the lotto one day, or a more possible surprise, maybe would entail a trip to foreign place like Greece.

I have always loved any surprises having to do with the expression of love. Such as, an announcement of an engagement proposal, announcing a birth, an unexpected gesture of affection like a hug or kiss, gifts for no reason, random acts of kindness, and anonymous giving. Finding out later that somebody that cares about you did something for you without wanting recognition--just did it because they love you & they knew it would make you happy.

I also enjoy other surprises that life has to offer. Such as, exciting adventures, good humor, inspiring stories, being affected by a song, cutting edge technology that is helpful and user friendly for me, travels, being moved by art, tasting a new recipe that makes my taste buds dance, attempting things that I wasn’t aware could make me happy &/or ever imagined I would be able to accomplish.

However, I am not a fan of negative surprises, such as, finding out that I have some heavy metal toxicity, in addition, to Lyme’s disease. I want to say No thank you, and I will pass on accepting this surprise. Unfortunately, I have to accept it because it is the only way I will be able to deal and release it.

There is a stark difference, from when I became ill and was barely able to function in every day life, to now being able. I strolled into the doctor’s office on Tuesday, actually excited to share with them that there has been a noticeable difference in my symptoms. I wait patiently for the doctor after the nurse asks me routine questions and then takes my vitals. The doctor, finally, comes into the room. He takes a seat, and situates himself. My eyes glance down at the folder he brought with him. The rather large folder contains my chart, my blood work, my other diagnostic test results, and the doctor’s notes. I’m thinking to myself, for the first time, all he has to write down in my folder is that I have made progress; instead of our usual, which is me explaining to him what new symptoms I was experiencing and how I feel worse.

The doctor asks how I have been feeling for the past month, and I respond with my exciting news. I explain to him a list of things that I am able to do now. Moreover, how happy the list makes me. The list I shared with him was that I am able to do more things for myself, doing more things with my friends and family, able to do more things for my husband, take Kaya on walks, clean and organize my house, go to the store, cook and bake, daily chores, run errands, and I started yoga. In addition, I started this blog, and working on another blog. I was surprised to see that he did not even crack a smile to my exciting news. Why is my doctor not sharing my enthusiasm for my progress? He answers this question, without me even asking, that he is shocked with everything that I am currently able to do. He went on to express that I need to cut back on the list of things that I am doing so that my body can reserve the energy needed to continue to fight Lyme’s and start chelating therapy to rid heavy metal toxins. I know about the Lyme’s part of my situation. Did he really just say that I have heavy metal toxicity stacked on the Lyme disease? Yes, he sure did. What a bummer!

I have had so many tests done that I did not even remember that I still had some results that were pending. Ugh! I realized in that moment that this appointment was not going to be as easy, positive, and short, as I had anticipated and hoped. This is a bummer!

The doctor handed me a copy of my test results, and then we went through everything one by one. I am fortunate that I have a doctor that always spends so much time thoroughly explaining the answers to my questions. Granted I do not always want to hear the truth, but nonetheless, in the end I am happier that I know the truth.

He sent me on my way with this new knowledge and scripts, so I could go over to the lab for some routine blood work before they closed. I also managed to forget that I had to get the blood work done, which totally smothered my plans to attend a yoga class. Oh well, there is always tomorrow to feed my new addiction to yoga.

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